Diary Entry: Craving Attention

Speaking as a submissive, a few simple words from a Mistress, or focused attention on a sub–even if for a short period of time–is an amazing experience. The communication is evaluated, each word’s meaning taken by itself and in the larger context. Often the communicated ideas become extrapolated in the submissive’s mind and a wonderful fantasy builds out from there.

I do as I’m instructed. I work on my sissy diary, I try and keep Mistress Lillith well compensated. I listen to my mantras.

Arousal grows, and soon I can barely contain myself. 

“Let me check my Niteflirt again to see if Mistress Lillith sent anything,” I think. Check – nothing. “Okay, maybe I’ll check again in another hour.” Nope. The cycle repeats. Alone with my diary, mantras, and thoughts I continue to plod along dutifully.

“I really need to be tied down and spanked… hard and fast until I cry,” the thought enters my mind. It sounds so thrilling now. It will be decidedly painful during. Afterwards will be a blissful subspace of total power exchange where I know my dom has been really focused on me.


Maybe the reason some subs act up and “stir the pot” is… for attention? Attention from a dom is incredibly satisfying–even if the mechanism for attaining attention is like a child throwing a fit. I mean, it’s a bad, unhealthy habit for a sub but sometimes it illicit a challenge-rebuttal type response and so it gets employed again when the urge grows.

As I reach the end of this diary entry here I am focusing on *my needs* as a submissive. Which is sadly sort of the opposite of what I think I should be doing.

Does an ideal sub have needs? I don’t know. Am I pleasing Mistress Lillith? I don’t know. I am lost without my dom, my only known guidance to dutifully continue with the last instructions I received. \

And then it comes. My breathing becoming short, my heart rate quickens, my hands and legs tremble as I click. The world grows larger and blissful subspace ensues.

The cycle renews.

Anticipation grows within my sissies and subs alike, as I grow your need to be feminized as as you walk the feminine walk, you find yourself becoming super charged with emotions and hormone driven ‘teen like’ sexual angst. Behave and steady yourself, above all…


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